Patience

Whenever you ask for “patience” know that you are going to get opportunities to learn patience. Having children, training pets, growing plants and living with someone all involve having and learning patience.

Taking a trip also involves patience. You have to wait in line, wait in another line, deal with communication issues which may include another language, and tons of other situations.

The pilgrimage also provided opportunities to have patience with myself, not to beat myself up but to give myself lee-way and breathing room. You learn to do with what you have and make the best of what is available.

When we were walking there were times when the path was so steep that all I could do was to put one foot in front of the other and hope for the best.

After awhile they became the “kiss the earth” hills. I was bent over so far that my face seemed to be only inches away from the ground, so close that I could kiss the earth. When you finally make it to the top you want to fall to the ground and kiss the earth.

So as I was crawling upwards I would glance up from time to time to see how far I had to go. I would look up and see a curve and sky and know I was about to reach the top. Yeaaa! I could make it to that curve, I knew I could. Guess what I saw when I went around the curve? Right. Another curve. And another curve and another curve.

When I finally got to the top, on this one particular day, I threw myself on the ground and announced, “I’m not moving. When you’re ready to go, roll my body down the other side.”

Walking every day gives you plenty of time to contemplate. Sometimes, someone would bring up an issue or say a particular word or phrase that would pinch a sore spot prompting tears to flow. You ask yourself how that could be.

There is nothing wrong. The wound is healing. What is occurring is that this is the time for the next layer, a deeper layer, to come up to be healed. We all have wounds, scrapes and cuts that need soothing. When they are stuffed down and ignored they don’t go away. Hiding hurts does not make them magically disappear. When the time is right the bruise will surface to be transformed.

Patience has to be one of the requirements of a bus driver. Our bus driver had patience oozing out of his pores. More than once when he was driving our 4 lane wide bus down the driveway size mountain roads we would come to a mere crawl on a hairpin curve.

The fourth day of the journey, careening toward us down the hill was our mirror image. Could these gargantuan vehicles succeed in slithering by each other? The buses met, whispering to each other but never touching and then lumbering on to their private destinations. I think the buses may have been made of rubber.

I’ve often found that patience is doing something else in the meantime.

That reminds me of a politically incorrect story that happened while waiting in a lunch line in a little teeny Italian village. I don’t think this small store ever had 40 people trying to cram into it in its entire existence. They were definitely not set up for a group experience.

We lined up about 10 at a time with most of us waiting outside the establishment. After about 15 minutes my buddy and I squeezed inside to wait a little longer. The first item that caught our eye was a small bottle of wine right there in front of us on the shelf. It very well could have hit the floor and shattered if we had not quickly grabbed it.

Some how the top came off and again we rescued the floor by consuming the contents. We still had to wait in line but we were happy while we waited. I did say we were in Italy. They have wine with lunch in Italy. We were only keeping up with the locals.

I am now an expert on patience. I’ve been stretched, pulled, pushed, ignored and applauded. Is there anything left that I can’t handle? I don’t know but I’m sure I’ll find out.

Oh yes. While waiting to go through Customs back in the States, I was sniffed out by the Security dog. I had to fork over my apple and pear that I was saving for a snack. No sweat. I felt Phrantastic!

Trust

Trust is a small 5 letter word that is huge and carries a lot of weight. I have never really had a hard time with trust. Trust is my first response until I am given a reason not to trust.

But, the trust I am referring to here is the knowing that all is as it is meant to be. Whatever the situation, what ever the outcome, something good and beneficial will be forthcoming. You may have to wait a bit and have patience but that is all part of the lesson.

Trust your ability to find your own way. Stand on your own two feet. That’s what you have feet for, to stand on, to move you forward or in another direction.

Trust that you have a place. You are valuable. After all, there is only one of you. Even if you’re one of a twin or triplet, you are unique, an original, and important. In fact, you are so important that you will always be taken care of. You do have to let go of your own schemes and plans in order to be taken care of.

I’ll give you an example, a story of what happened to one of us on the pilgrimage.

It was the third day, early in the afternoon. We had trekked up a steep mountain side and were preparing to go down the other side which was equally as steep if not more so. The narrow path continued through the woods and was strewn with small stones and carved by the rain into ruts.

Marcia was behind me. We had progressed only a few minutes when I heard “OH” and a thump. Turning around, I saw Marcia on the ground holding her leg with her foot at a very strange angle. We all stopped walking and rushed to her aid.

Fortunately, 3 of us were nurses and many were healers. A splint was made from a Camel back. Marcia was covered with wraps and jackets and held to keep warm. She was calm. An ambulance was summoned.

When we knew that help was on the way, we left her with a nurse and an interpreter, trusting that all would be well. We continued on sending love and healing energy as we walked, even using the echo factor of the mountain to send her messages. She heard us and felt our love and concern.

Marcia stayed on the trip but not on the actual walk. She was wheelchair bound with both bones broken in her leg knowing she would need an operation back in the states. Her spirits never dampened. She was there to see the Pope in Assisi.

This was the third and last major accident. Robin had fallen on the first day and had 2 breaks in her right arm. George went to her aid when she fell and twisted his knee so badly that he was out of commission for a good part of the walk. I don’t know how she did it but Robin continued to walk with her arm in a cast.

The point is, they all knew everything would turn out fine and it did. They all trusted. They relied on their intuition and ours.

One more story. This one is about a bus ride on our very first day. We had walked. We were tired. The bus picked us up to take us back to the convent at Santuario della Verna for dinner and a second night’s stay. As we were winding our way up the narrow pass, a car came careening toward us on our side of the road! For all appearances, it was an accident waiting to happen.

But wait! We were on their side of the road at the exact moment that they were on our side of the road. Do not try this on your own road. Not recommended. We were in Italy. Things are different there.

My last word on trust is this: Thinking is hazardous to your mental health – rely on your intuition.

Surrender

How do you surrender and at the same time live your life the way you want to live, to live life to the fullest?

Perhaps the easiest way to explain my interpretation is to tell you to get out of your head and into your heart. One of my favorite sayings is: “Thinking is hazardous to your mental health.”

I’m not talking about surrendering to rules and regulations or to the government nor to any other organized or formalized type of association. I’m talking about surrendering to the Higher Power that resides within you.

And the only way you are going to find that connection is to go inside your own self, say “hello” and wait for an answer and wait and wait. The hard part is to not beat yourself up while you’re waiting. Oh, you’ll get all sorts of thoughts and thinking popping up. But when you get beyond the thoughts, even for a moment, you come to a place of connection which will expand and become an inner peace which develops into an incredible freedom.

Sound familiar? It’s also called meditating. (Stop sighing and keep reading.)

One of the major reasons for meditating is to get out of your brain. Give it a rest. Let go of the incessant chatter, stop planning and conniving. Just be.

You’ll get to meet yourself. The real You that lives inside; the part that is connected to All That Is. What you’ll find is a handy ability called intuition that will grow and develop the more you use it, the more you rely on it.

I used to meditate because I thought I had to. Now I meditate because it feeds my soul, my inner self, my Higher Self. Now meditating is a necessity, like breathing.

No one can tell you what to do, how to live, who to be. I can only share with you my part of the journey and the extra steps I learned on the walk to Assisi.

I surrendered to the day, the walk, the direction (straight up at all times until it became straight down the other side), the weather (we walked in the rain two days), and the snoring.

Oh, let me tell you about that, the snoring, right now.

The 41 of us stayed at convents, hostels and small hotels (none 4 star I assure you), for 1 or 2 nights. Each establishment had different accommodations, either 2 or 3 or 4 to a room, we never knew which we would get. We never knew who we would share a room with and often heard, “So, who are you sleeping with tonight?”

Since I’ve lived by myself for several years I’m not used to someone snoring the minute their head hits the pillow. This one particular night there were 3 of us sharing a room. As I was gratefully pulling up the covers, the first woman was already comatose and sounded like she was sucking the plaster off the ceiling. The woman in the middle instantly regretted being in the same room and wished for plugs for her ears or duct tape for her cacophonous friend.

My one voiced remark was, “I wonder if St. Francis snored?” We both fell asleep without another qualm.

Part of surrendering to “what is” is being able or choosing to change perspective. Drop your plans. Take a different tack. Release the issue. Give up your expectations and every one else’s. Let go. What are you holding onto anyway? Whatever it is it’s really only a thought in your own mind. Give it up.

Surrender to the music and dance.
Surrender to the joke and laugh.
Surrender to the embrace and love.
Surrender to life and live it to the fullest.
Surrender to your Self and Be.

Pace e Bene.

What I Learned On The Walk For Peace!

My original intention was to write a blog a day while on the walk, and send it along with photos to post. That never happened – obviously. I did write a blog after the first day of the walk, chose pictures and attempted to send it to my VA to post.

However, the Universe had other ideas.

The result is this: an overview, which this blog will be, and 7 key points or tools or benefits that were made clear on the walk. Of course, I’ll add in personal and group stories to bring the experience more alive and closer to you.

I’ll tell you about “kiss the earth” hills, broken bones, my angel in the red car, inside jokes, communications without language, the St. Francis release, a few other stories and share photos.

If I had to title the whole experience with one word it would be a word that I learned on the trip which is Hokahey. Hokahey is an American Indian word which literally means, “This is a good day to die.” Think about that for a moment.

If you were to die right now and leave this dimension, what in your life would not be completed? Would you have any regrets? Granted, there are always more things to experience, there always will be. I’m talking about up till now. Is there someone you need to forgive? Is it yourself?

We’re all going to leave this dimension. Everyone who has taken a first breath will one day take a last breath on this earth. I don’t believe we end. We simply change form. But I digress – back to the walk.

On the plane ride home from Rome I thought about what the trip meant to me. What did I learn? What meaning does St. Francis hold for me? He must mean something since I have walked in his footsteps twice, visited his birthplace, laid in the hollow of the rock he slept on, sat where he meditated and visited his final resting place as well as his dying place.

Physically, Francesco Bernardo was a short man whose ears stuck out. He was wealthy, happy, friendly, lovable, loved to love and wanted to make a mark for himself. He wanted to become a Knight which was a bloody pursuit to say the least.

With a gift of fine armor from his father he went off to war and was captured. To make a long story short, he changed his mind, became disgraced because of it, was rejected and chose to live as a beggar. Francis denied his wealth and took up a life of poverty but one which included generosity, gentleness, forgiveness, freedom, happiness and most importantly, love.

I learned from him to always follow my heart no matter who it displeases or what expectations are not met – mine or others. I learned to look beyond what is seen with my eyes and see with my soul. I discovered that very often my need is simply a preference which can be changed at will, if I will to change it instead of pouting, becoming cranky or withdrawing.

Our 10 days of walking always started with an hour of walking together in silence. I took that time to pray for you and all those who sent me prayers and all those on my list who didn’t send prayers. The list grew each day as I thought of other friends, co-workers, relatives, and people met by chance. I prayed for everyone I could think of and those I couldn’t remember. I prayed for myself as well.

These are the one per blog points that I will write about, the things that stood out bold, the messages I received, the important thoughts that came to me:

1, Surrender = giving up control, setting intentions, releasing expectations.
2, Trust = all is as it is meant to be, intuition.
3, Patience = waiting, perseverance, communication.
4, Acceptance = eating what is offered, receiving with gratitude.
5, Non-attachment = sharing, giving away, making plans, agendas.
6, Living the moment = valuing what you have when you have it.
7, Rest = self care, asking for what you need, in tune with your body.

Has my life changed? I would say my life continues to evolve, constantly unfolding, becoming more, being freer, daring to live as I am. I am exactly the same yet totally different.

Pace e Bene.